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Why Toddler Hitting Is Never Okay: The Causes and Consequences

Toddler hitting is never okay. In fact, it can be quite dangerous for both the toddler and the person that they are hitting. There are many reasons why toddlers might hit others, and it is important to understand these causes in order to help prevent this behavior

In this blog post, we will explore the causes of toddler hitting and discuss the consequences of this behavior.

What Is Toddler Hitting?

Toddler hitting is the behavior of hitting another person with their hands or other body parts. This can be done in a number of ways, including:

  • Hitting with an open hand
  • Hitting with a fist
  • Kicking
  • Biting

If a toddler hits another child or person, it’s important to correct the child’s behavior immediately. This way, a child will immediately stop hitting other people. This hitting stage should never be tolerated or excused.

Hitting should be prohibited. After all, children hit others if they think it’s OK for them to do so.

Sometimes, the hitting behavior is just a phase, and children will stop hitting others once they understand that hitting hurts and those hitting incidents are always unpleasant. By teaching children about self-control, you can achieve a positive disciplinary dynamic.

Why Do Toddlers Hit Others?

There are many reasons why toddlers might hit others. Some of the most common reasons include:


Toddlers often hit when they are frustrated. This can be due to things like not being able to communicate what they want or not being able to do something that they want to do.

However, just because a toddler is frustrated doesn’t mean that hitting is an acceptable way to express this frustration. It’s important to teach toddlers how to deal with their frustration positively. Parenting tips always emphasize that parents should stick to alternative strategies to deal with frustration.

These strategies should make children avoid hitting other children or people. There is no such thing as a bad kid. Therefore, parents should always supervise closely with other parents to understand their kids and how their children interact with others.

frustrated little girl


Toddlers often imitate the behavior of those around them. If they see someone else hitting other people without being punished or told off, they may think that it is okay to do the same thing.

Parents and caregivers need to set a good example by never hitting or hurting other people, even when we are angry. Children are not good at reading body language and social skills, for they are not fully refined yet.

As a result, parents still have time to instill better behavior in their kids if they need to. There are plenty of positive ways to do this.

Toddler years are crucial in shaping their future behavior. If hitting is not dealt with early on, it can become a habit. The consequences of this could be extremely serious. Violent behavior should never be tolerated, no matter what the age of the person doing it is.

Staying calm will always pay off. Giving toddlers the attention they crave when they are hit will only reinforce this negative behavior. Withholding affection is a difficult thing to do, but in the long run, it will be beneficial.

It is essential to never give up on toddler discipline. With a little patience and persistence, parents can get through these years without too much trouble. After all, they will be grown up before you know it!


Sometimes, toddlers hit because they are angry. This can be due to things like feeling threatened or feeling like someone has hurt them somehow.

It’s important to help toddlers understand their emotions and teach them how to deal with anger positively. Parents must explain that anger is okay, but hitting is not. Telling a toddler to stop hitting others will make parents more confident that their children can stay calm in difficult situations.

Important lessons like this will come in handy later on when they have to deal with bullies or other kids who are mean to them.


Another common reason why toddlers hit others is jealousy. If a toddler sees another child playing with a toy they want or getting attention from someone they like, they may lash out and hit the other child.

A toddler who is upset will struggle to remain calm. As a result, they resort to biting, hitting, kicking, and other destructive behaviors. It’s essential for parents to understand that toddler hitting is a sign that their child is struggling to cope with their emotions.

sibling jealousy

If your toddler is hitting, try to find out what the underlying cause is so you can help them deal with their feelings constructively.

At the first sign of a toddler hitting, it’s crucial to intervene and stop the behavior. You can redirect your toddler’s attention, remove them from the situation, or ignore the behavior altogether.

It’s also crucial to avoid reacting in a way that will escalate the situation. Yelling, hitting back, or resorting to physical punishment will only teach your toddler that hitting is an acceptable way to deal with their frustration.

If you’re struggling to deal with your toddler’s hitting, talk to your child’s doctor or a professional for help. With the proper support, you can end this destructive behavior and help your toddler learn how to cope with their emotions healthily.

At best, parents can give their kids time out, so they won’t let their emotions get the best of them. Sure, controlling one’s emotions is a huge ordeal.

However, failing to control one’s words, reactions, and actions will make things worse.

At best, teach children how to manage their feelings. Talking and connecting with your toddler is the key to helping them understand why hitting isn’t acceptable behavior.

It’s also essential that parents refrain from hitting their toddlers in return. This will only perpetuate the problem and teach your toddler that violence is appropriate to solve problems.

If you’re struggling to deal with your toddler’s hitting, talk to your child’s doctor or a therapist for guidance.

Attention-Seeking Behavior

In some cases, toddlers hit others because they are seeking attention. Usually, this happens when a child’s reaction to almost everything is negative attention.

For example, if a toddler hits another child or his friends and the victims cry, the toddler gets the response they were looking for: someone is paying attention to them.

In this case, it’s essential to provide positive attention to your toddler when they are behaving well so that hitting isn’t their only way of getting your focus.

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How To Deal With Kids That Hit Others

kids hitting each other

There is no definitive answer to this question. Every toddler is different, and every situation is unique. However, some tips on how to deal with toddler hitting include:

Try to identify the reasons why your toddler is hitting.

One of the most important things that parents can do is to identify why their toddlers or toddlers are hitting others. You also need to ask questions: Is it because they’re seeking attention? Are they angry or frustrated about something?

By identifying the reasons behind the toddler’s hitting, you’ll be able to develop a better solution on how to deal with it.

Set clear boundaries and consequences for hitting.

Set clear boundaries for hitting behavior in kids. You need to ensure that your toddler knows that hitting is not acceptable behavior. You also need to establish clear consequences for hitting, such as time-outs or losing privileges.

Be consistent with your disciplinary actions.

If you want your toddler to stop hitting, you need to be consistent with your disciplinary actions.

If you give them a time-out for hitting, you should always give them a time-out whenever they hit someone else. This way, they’ll know you do not tolerate hitting, and they’ll be less likely to do it in the future.

Talk to your toddler about their feelings.

It’s also important that you talk to your toddler about their feelings. Help them to understand why they might feel angry or frustrated. This way, they can learn to express their emotions positively.

When a child suppresses their emotions, it can lead to toddler hitting. So you must help your toddler learn how to express their feelings healthily.

Encourage positive behavior.

Finally, be sure to encourage positive behavior. When your toddler does something good, praise them and tell them that you’re proud of them. This will help them feel good about themselves and be more likely to behave well in the future.

Toddler hitting is never okay. It’s important to understand the causes of this behavior so that you can help your toddler learn how to express their emotions healthily. If you need help, don’t hesitate to reach out to a professional, as they can offer guidance and support.

The bottom line is that toddler hitting is never acceptable.

By taking the time to understand why it happens and addressing the underlying causes, you can help your toddler learn how to express their emotions positively. This will benefit them now and in the future.

good parenting

Consequences of Toddler Hitting

Immediate consequences can include:

  • Your toddler may get hurt if they hit someone who hits back.
  • Your toddler may get into trouble with you or other adults.
  • Your toddler may lose friends if they hit them too much.
  • Your toddler may have difficulty sleeping or have bad dreams if they think about hitting people.

Long-term consequences can include:

  • They may become a bully if they continue to hit others. This usually happens when kids feel mad, and they are never allowed to use their words to tell their friends.
  • They may struggle with making and keeping friends. Sure, age is a determining factor in friendships, but hitting can make it harder for your toddler to find friends their age.
  • They may get a reputation as someone who hits, and no one wants to play with them. No matter the age, kids will have a bad day if they cannot mingle with friends their age.
  • They may easily get into fights as they grow older. This is because being mad and hitting are closely related. If your toddler hits, they may think it is okay to hit others when they get older.
  • They may have trouble in school if they can’t control their anger. This might anger other moms and other children, too.
  • They may develop mental health problems, such as anxiety or depression, if they don’t learn to deal with their emotions healthily.

It is important to nip this behavior in the bud so that your toddler does not become a hitter as they grow older. Feelings will always be a part of life, but hitting does not have to be. If your child is tired, frustrated, or angry, there are other ways to handle these emotions.

Try to redirect your toddler’s energy into something positive, such as playing with a toy or reading a book.

Hitting can become a learned behavior if it’s not dealt with properly. Words and being in a state of worry will always make a day bad. Therefore, it is crucial to remain calm when toddler hitting occurs. If you lose your temper, you are modeling the wrong behavior for your kids.

It’s essential to be consistent with your toddler when it comes to hitting. Whether it’s a light swat on the bottom or verbal discipline, follow through with what you say you will do each time your toddler hits.

You must also be consistent in disciplining other children in your care. If you don’t, your toddler will quickly learn that hitting is an effective way to get what they want.

If your toddler is hitting, it’s essential to take action. By understanding the causes and addressing them, you can help your child learn how to express their emotions more positively.

When Should I Call A Professional?

You should call a professional if your toddler’s hitting is:

  • Severe (your child hits hard or frequently)
  • Getting worse
  • Directed towards a certain person (such as a sibling)
  • Happening in addition to other troubling behaviors (such as biting)

If you’re concerned about your toddler’s hitting, don’t hesitate to reach out for help. A professional can assess the situation and guide you to address the problem.


Toddler hitting is never okay and should never be tolerated or excused. It’s important to take action if your toddler engages in this behavior. By understanding the causes and addressing them, you can help your child learn how to express their emotions more positively. 

It’s always better to teach important lessons to make a kid realize that hitting is never okay. Better behavior should always be encouraged and emphasized at all times.

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